“When I’m Gone”, tells a powerful story of domestic violence, attempted murder, and the fight for survival. I recount my experiences of enduring these horrors, the overwhelming grip of the flight response, the supernatural powers and instincts I summoned to protect my children, and the subsequent journey towards recovery.

In sharing my experience of what is often referred to as non-fatal strangulation (NFS), I recall the impact and the aftermath that the near fatal attack had on the lives of myself & my young children. Many unexpected & frightening symptoms can follow a life threatening attack. After the threat response is triggered, if the arousal cycle doesn’t complete, the threat response can remain locked on, resulting in the body reacting to anything & everything that resembles a threat, regardless of whether the threat is real or perceived, which impacted my life for years.

No one tells you that survival mode out of context, can be terrifying, painful & confusing, or that survival is a natural, healthy response in all mammals & the symptoms are appropriate reactions given the circumstances in which they occurred.

‘When I’m Gone’ chronicles an unprovoked vicious attack that almost ended my life, and how it led to a journey of self-discovery, true love, passion & purpose.

According to a study published in the Journal of Emergency Medicine, (Glass, et.al., 2008), found that 24.6% of 57 adult women killed by a male intimate partner in 1995 or 1996 in Chicago were killed by strangulation or smothering.

Of the 494 women sampled as they attended hospitals & clinics in Chicago who had experienced intimate partner violence in the past year, 47.3% had experienced one or more incidents of choking strangulation by her partner and 57.6% had ‘ever’ experienced choking or strangulation by their abusive partner.

<p>There was no difference between women who were not killed and the women who were killed in having experienced prior choking or strangulation.</p>
<p>In summary, the authors of the study found that non-fatal strangulation is an important predictor for future lethal violence among women who are experiencing intimate partner violence.</p>
<p>Glass, N., Laughon, K., Campbell, J., Block, C. R., Hanson, G., Sharps, P. W., &amp; Taliaferro, E. (2008). Non-fatal Strangulation is an Important Risk Factor for Homicide of Women. <i>The Journal of Emergency Medicine</i>, <i>35</i>(3), 329–335. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jemermed.2007.02.065</p>